BoxRec

CHOC, have you been telling fibs?

Surely not. You wouldn't lie to us, would you? You're a law-abiding man, after all. A man who believes in his God and his family.

Sure, there are some cynical types out there who might suggest you don't mind telling a small porky or two if it means you might be able to make a buck. You know, just stretching the truth a tad.

But not us. We believe you, Anthony.

So help us out here.

For most of this year you've been telling us that you're a blind man walking. That your left eye is buggered. That your doctors and your manager have urged you to undergo an operation to repair it.

But no, you would prefer to leave it in the safe hands of Allah.

In fact, you say you only have 50 per cent vision in that eye and when you step into the ring on Monday night to fight Jose Alberto Clavero, the Argentinian will look like a silhouette to you.

Now Anthony. We know you're a very good athlete. You can move and shift and adapt better than most of us. Your reflexes are supreme. Frankly, you're one of a kind. And you're spot on. There has never been anyone like you before.

But mate, with an eye like that we wouldn't like your chances against one of those lard butts on The Biggest Loser lugging a box of Krispy Kremes under one arm, let alone another pro fighter.

So we made some inquiries yesterday, purely because we were growing concerned about your health. None of us would want to see you lying flat on your back in the first few rounds and spending the rest of your life with a labrador by your side.

And do you know what people were saying? You wouldn't believe it. Some had the audacity to suggest that your eye isn't, well, umm, isn't quite as bad as you've made out.

We were outraged, of course, because you know what they're really suggesting, don't you.

Anthony Mundine is a drama queen. That's what they mean. Well, either that or you just talk the talk to sell more tickets. And there's no way any sane human in this city could even contemplate you stooping to such a trick.

So we called Dr Lou Lewis, legendary fight doctor who will officiate at next week's bout. He was in his office waiting to see you for a final examination. "Lou," we said, "tell us it's true. Tell us that Anthony is going to perform a miracle and fight with only half an eye."

"A lot of it is just bulls...," said the Doc. "He's a self-perpetuating publicity machine."

Well, Choc. We were shocked and didn't quite know what to say after that. In fact we swear we could hear Doc Lewis laughing at the other end of the phone.

"No one would let him get into a ring if he had 50 per cent or less vision," he said. "It just wouldn't happen. I'm hoping to see him later today for a final look. But he's already been cleared and no one would dare take any chances."

Sure enough, we checked back later in the day and Lewis had examined you, conducted all those blood tests you boxers have to undergo - HIV, hepatitis B and C - and you were all clear. And just as importantly, he was happy with your eye.

"His peripheral vision is OK. He meets all the criteria. He looks OK," the doc said.

You can imagine the relief we all felt. We'd been on tenterhooks for hours. We'd called Kathy McClellan, an ophthalmic surgeon who has also examined you and reported back to the Boxing Authority of NSW that your vision was fine and you were fit enough to get into a ring and be pounded for 12 rounds.

So just know this. Come Monday night at the Entertainment Centre, we'll be in your corner. And those knockers out there, those non-believers? Forget about them. It's just the blind leading the blind.

Collins2000 wrote:I don't think Mundine can control it.

I honestly doubt he knows what he's going to say; he just opens his mouth and the shite starts flowing.

Still, it gets him noticed, I suppose.