Jesus, you did a shift at the Marmaris?? That's pretty hardcore, mate! I wouldn't go in there without ten pints of Dutch courage inside me, and that's just as a customer.
Speaking of which, I did get a free kebab there once cos I calmed down some mouthy piece of shit much like the ones in your article. We didn't fight but I got my point across and he behaved himself. Pretty stupid of me, actually, considering I wasn't wearing a stab-proof vest